Your beanie has arrived! Beanie? Who the hell considers this a beanie? We used to call them "knit caps." Anyway, it sure is swell.

• 60% cotton, 40% acrylic, 100% style. GARF style, baby. Oh yeahhhh.
• Breathable cotton blend, so your scalp won't roast like a Virginia ham.
• Form-fitting shape. Head shape, to be precise. Speaking of which...
• One size fits most of your pointy heads, but there are exceptions. Like you, Matt.